Here’s another shot in filling up a clean page of my journal. I’ve been staring at my pen for half an hour already while my peripheral takes a glance at the portrait she made me last night.
I was standing there inside that classy bookstore, a sweat and somewhat damped by rain. Like any other days, it was cold yet muggy. I was supposed to meet her in another place but my sense of direction again, failed me at crunch time. There I was looking for the best spot so I can readily catch her attention from the entrance. Well, I really wanted a perfect ambush. I found the ideal bushes; in front of me were piles of books on sale. I grabbed Palahniuk when she caught me in swift; suddenly, she was mutely standing beside me. Guess who lost the battle?
After days and weeks of exchanging mails and pillow talks, I finally saw her. It was awkward like the normal. We greeted with nonchalant hello’s and hi’s and funnily I heard it spoken in gibberish. I tried to act as adequate as possible while conversing. I found myself blankly staring at her while she waltzed her way out of the holiday rush. I silently chuckled as I recalled it was November 2 – funny to think it was sort of an All Souls’ Day date. We settled on a ship looking bar, sat and ordered the Red one while she ordered the Pale. Again, I giggled inside while my brain kept teasing me to crack a joke; unknowingly she was way too fast and clever for me – like what we normally see from her posts daily. Finally, I laughed myself silly with no form of restraint.
Same circus – life stories, ex’s, college band days, parents, job idealisms, future plans and the common drama. As she guzzled her Pale, it sunk in, like yes, I am finally with her. The talks were on going and I made sure I pop my play-dead like thoughts for her. I smirked in between sips while she retorted back with her sugary smile, not realizing the lip-balm effect has been controlling me all through out. She took out her camera and took random shots on whatever’s on our table. We drew each other like drunk kids doodling walls, then we exchanged journals and sadly left hopeful notes, typically, I thought, expressed in unsure sentences. I tried to talk her over my dilemma but I just couldn’t tell how I’ve become. I guess it felt like it was one of those reluctant deals on a win or lose match or bottom-line is, I found her more precious than aces and I’m afraid I just can’t let her go easily. Pussy me. I decided to let it pass and just took pleasure about us being together.
We called it a night. I can’t remember the last time I rode a cab with somebody who’s not just a usual co-passenger. You know what I mean. We felt the urge to hold hands as if it was doomsday. I was counting in nanoseconds and for once, I desired traffic to interrupt our travel time. I recalled it was All Souls’ day. Then, I saw two empty souls kissed the night away, as if they’re on their 70’s and the days are numbered.
That’s the real story. It wasn’t just a date. It was when two spirits found refuge while clock-watching. That’s what I think. I hope I’m right.
from: A Tumblr Friend
:)
